Men's Grooming

Table of contents

Child pages

  • What I've noticed women seem to find attractive in men is:
    • being tall
    • having a symmetrical face
    • good skin
    • being in shape
    • smiling
    • confidence
    • being well-groomed (clothing)
    • connecting with people
    • sense of humor
    • being seen as the social center of a room
    • having some exciting lifestyle (eg competitive motocrosser, athlete, musician)

Smiling

  • What I've noticed is that there's no great way to fake this; if you're happy you'll be smiling, otherwise you won't be.
  • Things I think I've noticed that make people happy:
    • Getting enough sleep
    • Exercise (eg indoor soccer or lifting). I've found I feel the best during the same day that I do the activity, so for example I'll feel very talkative after playing indoor soccer. Or (as I write this) I feel much more cheerful at work if I worked out that morning.
    • Being in a healthy relationship with someone who makes you feel good / wanted

Connecting with people

  • I should spend some time thinking about exercises that would help someone get better at this.
  • I should also spend some time thinking about how to do this as efficiently as possible (eg not wasting lots of time talking to people all day)

Sense of humor

  • I should spend some time thinking about what makes people 'funny'
  • Some thoughts:
    • exaggeration
    • telling funny stories?
    • making fun of yourself?
    • talking about things you have found funny? (eg me relating some video I had seen where the ending to a harry potter novel is revealed to someone waiting in line for the novel)

Clothing

Reddit - PSA: Guide to washing clothes and dry cleaning
http://www.reddit.com/r/malefashionadvi ... _cleaning/
- This seems like an excellent guide to me.

This is a topic that comes up quite a bit on MFA, so I've complied advice from various posts into the definitive guide. I hope it helps!

The basics
Batch similar colours to cut down on loads. T-shirts and shirts can be washed together. Have a mix of underwear colours so no matter what you're washing you always have underwear.
A front-loader washing machine is far gentler on your clothes than a top-loader. Hand washing is best, but hey, who has time. (Bonus: front-loaders are usually more efficient in water/power usage and better for the environment)
Use less detergent than recommended - past a point more detergent doesn't mean cleaner, it just builds up in your clothes.
Just because it doesn't smell, doesn't mean it isn't dirty
The only items that should ever go in the dryer are underwear, socks, and possibly undershirts. Everything else should be hung to dry. Get a cheap fold-out clothes rack to dry your clothes on.
Tumble dryers are brutal on clothes - even on delicate settings they are too hot for most items, and the tumbling will wear out the clothes very quickly. All that lint collected in the filters? That's the fabrics wearing down.
Never dry clothes in the sun (except for whites) - it will bleach the colours very quickly.
Dry cleaning is very harsh on your clothes, try to keep it to the minimum

Socks and underwear
Socks and underwear should be washed after every wear, no exceptions.
Washed on warm cycles (30 C, 80ish F)
Can be dried using a dryer - these are the only items you should ever consider using a dryer - everything else should be hung to dry.

T-shirts, undershirts, sweat shirts and polo shirts
T-shirts, undershirts and polo shirts - basically anything very close to you skin - should be washed after every wear, again, no exception.
Sweatshirts can be washed infrequently, assuming you're wearing them over a t-shirt, after every 5 or more wears. This is solely dependent on how they're treated and how dirty you think they're getting.
They will usually be ok with warm water (polo shirts may need a cold cycle)
Gently pull them into shape before hang drying or flat drying for sweatshirts.

Dress/business/button-down shirts
Should be washed after every wear. If you wear undershirts they can be worn 2 to 4 times before washing, depending on what sort of treatment they get while being worn, what sort of environment you wear them in.
A good quality shirt, treated well, should last hundreds of wears and washes.
Washed on the most gentle cycle in cold water. Hand washing is better, but time consuming. Some guides say that shirts should be put in a delicates bag to protect the collar points and cuffs, I've never found that necessary.
Shirts should only ever be dried on a wood hanger to keep the shape - Ikea hangers are great for this. Never user a wire hanger - you will ruin the shape of your shirts.
Under no circumstances have them dry cleaned, but laundered is OK, although they will not last as long if you send them out for laundering.
If your business shirts start to get stained around the collar, a bi-carb of soda paste massaged into the collar and left for 10 mins works, other methods use a vinegar and liquid detergent mixture.
If your underarms get a build-up that smells when you wear them, dipping the underarms in a 50/50 cloudy ammonia/water mixture and letting it sit for 10 mins is good for this. This also works well for t-shirts.
NEVER re-iron dress/business shirts after wearing them once - you're cooking the sweat, dirt, dust etc. into the fabric and significantly increasing the likelihood it will smell after a short time. Ironing a shirt is not the same as washing it - it doesn't clean it.

Jumpers/sweaters/cardigans/knits
Anything wool should generally be dry-cleaned, unless it explicitly says machine wash
Then, only on cold, gentle settings, with a slow spin. Or even better hand wash (but never wring them out)
Use a gentle detergent designed for wool.
Knits should be gently pulled into shape, if required, then dried flat (that is, horizontally), either on a fold out drying rack even better on a pop-up mesh rack. These can be bought very cheaply.
Never ever ever put these in a dryer.

Anything silk
Extra gentle hand wash in cold water, with a very mild detergent.
Hang dry only
Dry cleaning is generally out of the question, unless you go to a specialist cleaner

Jeans/chinos
Jeans/cotton chinos should be washed every 4 to 8 or so wears (you be the judge) or if the knees are starting to stretch out. Cold wash only.
Exception - raw denim should not be washed, but soaked every 6 months to a year or even longer.
Hang dry only.

Linen suits/trousers
Linen trousers can be hand washed, cold only with a gentle detergent, or dry cleaned very occasionally. Hang dry only.
Spot treatments on light coloured linen will show, so use with caution
Linen suits should be dry cleaned only very infrequently (eg once a year). Even thought you might be washing the trousers, have the trousers and coat dry cleaned together, so if there is any fade from the dry cleaning you don't end up with a mis-matched suit.
Especially with light weight linens, dry cleaning will wear them out very quickly.

Suits
Suits should be dry cleaned only and very occasionally - usually once a year is enough, possibly more for lighter coloured suits.
Steamed gently in between for shape/wrinkles and the pants pressed for creases. Hanging in a steamy bathroom is a good method if you don't have a steamer.
You shouldn't wear a suit two days in a row - after you wear it it should be hung on a good quality hanger (to keep the shape), gently brushed and aired for a day or two.
If you press the pants yourself, don't iron directly on the fabric, it will go shiny - use a damp ironing cloth
If any suit claims it is machine washable, you should not be wearing it in the first place. Burn it.



eBay - How to Launder a Lacoste Polo
http://www.ebay.com/gds/How-to-Launder- ... 527/g.html
- very useful

Footwear

Sandals

  • These look cool, IDK how comfortable they are: GIANLUCA - HANDMADE SANDALS # 564 U MORO CUOIO
    • The sole looks like it's just a piece of leather. That can't be very comfortable after a day of walking around.
  • Birkenstocks are supposed to be really comfortable, but people say they look ugly. I don't think they look ugly, but I haven't tried them on my feet...

Watches

General Tips

  • Consider how heavy the watch is! I bought a Seiko 5 and the weight of the watch is compressing a vein that passes over the top of my wrist, to the point where it's uncomfortable and makes me want to take off the watch.
  • Search Google for "nice old wrist watch".
  • Beginner's Guide to Major Watch Brands
    http://www.chronocentric.com/watches/brands.shtml
  • NATO strap
    http://natostrapsco.com/
    http://gearpatrol.com/2014/01/07/icon-nato-strap/
    http://themonsieur.com/2012/11/25/the-m ... ch-straps/
  • 2012.08.19 - Forbes - A Plea For The Dress Watch
    http://www.forbes.com/sites/jackforster ... ess-watch/
    - MI: dress watches should be flat and minimalistic: no numbers, no second-hand. Don't wear a Rolex with a tuxedo.
  • 2012.09.02 - Forbes - Wanna Buy A Watch? Vintage Vs. New: A Guide For The Perplexed
    http://www.forbes.com/sites/jackforster ... perplexed/
    - "I discovered that half the fun of owning a watch is, like the fulfillment of all desires, about the pursuit –shopping around is fun and ownership is the beginning of something, but also the end." [Nathan: Hmm...that's not good.]
    - The "Seiko 5" is a good $75 mechanical watch: "keeps time quite nicely, within reason, and will run gamely for decades even if you ignore its most basic needs for an occasional cleaning and oiling"
    - Beware going to a boutique, they will seduce you and you'll end up paying more.
    - Look for a good "multi-brand authorized retailer", where the salesperson actually tries to figure out what the best watch for you will be.
    - "don’t buy from a salesperson who tries to rush you; don’t let yourself be upsold from your budget; and above all, don’t rush to buy anything –whatever it is that catches your eye, sleep on it."

Rolex

Etsy:
https://www.etsy.com/search/jewelry?q=rolex

Tynan's Ebay search:
http://www.ebay.com/sch/Wristwatches-/3 ... rmvSB=true

2012.09.03 - The Rolex Problem: A (Semi) Rational Look At The World's Most Recognized Watch
http://www.forbes.com/sites/jackforster ... zed-watch/
MI - People often go through three stages of opinion re: Rolex watches: First they love them, then they learn about other watches and don't like Rolexes, and then they realize over the years that their Rolexes are actually really good watches (reliable).

2012 - Rolexes: Why They're Awesome and How to Get Them Dirty Cheap
http://tynan.com/community/buyrolex

Hair

My hair
It seems like I should probably keep my hair buzzed short or shaved all the way.
- The barber on Uni. Ave in Palo Alto who saw me with my hair grown out and then buzzed it all off thought I looked much better with it buzzed.
- John said he thought I looked better with my hair grown out but with the beard kept short / groomed instead of grown out longer.
- M. thought I looked better with my head buzzed.
- In college, when I was 21, someone thought I looked like I was in my 40s with my hair / beard grown out.
- Dev said he thought I looked much better with my head shaved than with my hair grown out.


Hairstyles (head)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_hairstyles

The "regular" style is what I think I prefer:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regular_haircut
- Now I just need to figure out the specifics of how I prefer it to be cut.

- I think if you buzz your head very very short or shave your head to be totally bald, people will notice the shape of your head more than if you have some hair. So whether or not you should buzz your hair all the way off or leave a little hair on your head would seem to be a little determined by the shape of your head



Hairstyles (facial hair)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_facial_hairstyles


Hair cuts

- I asked a 20-something sales guy who is very well-groomed and has his hair looking neat, he said he gets his hair cut every 4-5 weeks, "whenever I can, whenever I remember". The cut costs $18-19 and he pays $20. He says the woman doesn't seem to mind not getting a big tip.



Treating hair loss

Elon Musk has probably the most dramatic reversal of hair-loss that I've seen. It seems that he used follicular unit transplantation:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Follicular ... plantation

...which is an advanced type of hair transplantation:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hair_transplantation
..which isn't exactly what it sounds like; you don't take the scalp off a dead body and strap it to your head. You remove small units of hair from other parts of your body and move them to the top of your head. Somehow the hair ends up looking like regular head hair instead of leg hair. IDK how it works.

Other related links:
http://www.quora.com/Hair/Where-did-Elo ... transplant
http://www.quora.com/Elon-Musk/How-has- ... s-baldness
http://hollywoodhairloss.com/elon-musk- ... ransplant/